There 4 emergency exits on this aircraft

"Zero Hour" (1957) was just recently on cable. It is one of the main films that "Airplane"(1980) parodies. Other influences on "Airplane" were of course the "Airport" disaster pictures of the 1970's, but "Zero Hour" seems to be the model. As a matter of fact, the hero is a former WWII fighter pilot named Stryker and the flight crew gets food poisoning. If you can quote lines from "Airplane" then this is the picture for you. Sterling Hayden, most famous for playing General Jack Ripper in "Dr. Strangelove", plays the hardcore traffic tower man that has to talk the plane down. You'll want to play both films simultaneously to compare Hayden and Robert Stack. Highly recommended.

Film Crew Slang

"Second Sticks"- If the clapper on the slate was not visible when the shot was being marked, the cameraperson might call out “second sticks!” to tell the 2nd AC or Loader to mark it a second time.

More Dialogue Greatness

"Repo Man" (1984)- 80's Punk Rock sci-fi classic from the warped mind of Director Alex Cox. We'll take a look at Cox's "Straight To Hell" (1987) a little later

Parnell (mad scientist) : Ever been to Utah? Ra-di-a-tion. Yes, indeed. You hear the most outrageous lies about it. Half-baked goggle-box do-gooders telling everybody it's bad for you. Pernicious nonsense. Everybody could stand a hundred chest X-rays a year. They ought to have them, too. When they canceled the project it almost did me in. One day my mind was full to bursting. The next day - nothing. Swept away. But I'll show them. I had a lobotomy in the end.


Otto: Lobotomy? Isn't that for loonies?


Parnell: Not at all. Friend of mine had one. Designer of the neutron bomb. You ever hear of the neutron bomb? Destroys people - leaves buildings standing. Fits in a suitcase. It's so small, no one knows it's there until - BLAMMO. Eyes melt, skin explodes, everybody dead. So immoral, working on the thing can drive you mad. That's what happened to this friend of mine. So he had a lobotomy. Now he's well again.

Words to live by...

All the ills of mankind, all the tragic misfortunes that fill the history books, all the political blunders, all the failures of the great leaders have arisen merely from a lack of skill at dancing.

Moliere

Film Gear has Funky Names

Snot Tape- Thin, clear, double-sided tape often used to attach lighting gels to their frames. Camera Assistants may use it carefully & sparingly to attach gel filters to the rear of lenses. Also known as ATG tape.
Paper Tape- Paper tape is similar to masking tape. It is photographic masking tape if you will. Usually ordered in black (though it comes in other colors for various purposes). The big difference is that it has a matte finish instead of a shiny finish so that it is less noticiable on camera and reflects light a lot less. Grips, electrics (lighting crew) and art department rely heavily on this stuff. It also has the benefit of being easier than other tapes to pull off without taking a layer of paint or finish with it.

Both of these items are considered expendables, i.e. items that you use up regularly and have to replace.

Film Crew Slang

"Last Looks"- The A.D.  might announce, “Last looks!” just before calling the roll . The hair, makeup & wardrobe people hurry in, quickly touch up the actors and check for any problems, continuity issues or discrepancies.

More Dialogue Greatness

The Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy (2004)

Ron Burgundy: Everyone just relax, all right? Believe me, if there's one thing Ron Burgundy knows, it's women.
Brian Fantana: I don't know, Ron.
Ron Burgundy: Guess what, I do. I know that one day Veronica and I are gonna to get married on top of a mountain, and there's going to be flutes playing and trombones and flowers and garlands of fresh herbs. And we will dance till the sun rises. And then our children will form a family band. And we will tour the countryside and you won't be invited.

Words to live by...

"My movies were the kind they show in prisons and airplanes, because nobody can leave."
Actor/Director- Burt Reynolds

Pick of the Week

Koyaanisqatsi (1982)- Who cares how you pronounce it?! It means life out of balance or unbalanced life in the Hopi Indian language. Ok...don't get bored on me yet. "K" is a real cinematographer's and editor's delight. They call it a documentary but it is more of a piece of visual art with environmental and societal themes. I climb trees, rarely hug them. Give Koyaanisqutsi a shot. Incredible time lapse photography set to an eery musical score. Great for late night.
See it for no other reason than it was almost impossible to view for an entire decade due to copyright issues.

Fancy words for down to earth filmmakers

Proscenium approach to shooting is fancy, schmancy wordage for filming as if it was a play and the camera is the audience. The actors are within the context of a large wide frame or proscenium arch as in the theatre.
In the early days, filmmakers began to realize the limitations of the proscenium approach and invented new techniques of separating into shots and sequences. ( pro·sce·ni·um)

Film Crew Slang

Cans & Bags: Empty film cans and small black plastic bags with film cores provided by the film lab to the camera crew for packaging and transporting exposed film. Very important to make sure that this very expensive footage is protected.

Pick of the Week

"Little Murders"(1971)- Alfred (Elliott Gould), a professional photographer dissatisfied with the commercialism of his art decides to opt out. The new subject of his photography is dog poo, representing the values of the world around him. Poo everywhere. He meets Patsy(Marsha Rodd) who saves him during a mugging, but his reaction to her intervention is unique.  Set against the stark lunacy of city life, a romance begins while New Yorkers are being randomly picked off by a sniper. Black comedy at it's best. If you don't like the dark side of comedy, rent Alvin & the Chipmunks instead and leave me alone.

Best Scene: Has to be the mugging scene. It introduces us to both Alfred and Patsy and their weirdness.

Dialogue Greatness...

"Monty Python and the Holy Grail" (1975)
King Arthur and his Knights search for the Holy Grail in arguably the most famous English comedy of a generation.

(Sir Bedevere has come upon villagers getting ready to burn a girl they say is a witch)

Sir Bedevere: There are ways of telling whether she is a witch.
Peasant 1: Are there? Oh well, tell us.
Sir Bedevere: Tell me. What do you do with witches?
Peasant 1: Burn them.
Sir Bedevere: And what do you burn, apart from witches?
Peasant 1: More witches.
Peasant 2: Wood.
Sir Bedevere: Good. Now, why do witches burn?
Peasant 3: ...because they're made of... wood?
Sir Bedevere: Good. So how do you tell whether she is made of wood?
Peasant 1: Build a bridge out of her.
Sir Bedevere: But can you not also build bridges out of stone?
Peasant 1: Oh yeah.
Sir Bedevere: Does wood sink in water?
Peasant 1: No, no, it floats!... It floats! Throw her into the pond!
Sir Bedevere: No, no. What else floats in water?
Peasant 1: Bread.
Peasant 2: Apples.
Peasant 3: Very small rocks.
Peasant 1: Cider.
Peasant 2: Gravy.
Peasant 3: Cherries.
Peasant 1: Mud.
Peasant 2: Churches.
Peasant 3: Lead! Lead!
King Arthur: A Duck.
Sir Bedevere: ..Exactly. So, logically....
Peasant 1: If she weighed the same as a duck... she's made of wood.
Sir Bedevere: And therefore...
Peasant 2: ...A witch!

Film Crew Slang

"Moving On": More Assistant Director lingo. When a shot is fully completed and the director wants to go to the next, the AD will say "Moving On". It tells the crew to immediately set up for the next shot, but is also meant as praise. You might also hear "New Deal" or a couple of other versions.

Wu not FU

Watching Lon Chaney in “Mr. Wu” (1927)-Silent
I have only seen parts of it before. Pretty heavy film. Relations out of wedlock, racism, illegitimate pregnancy, misunderstanding, tragedy, tenderness, revenge & cruelty.  And they said folks in the 1920’s just played ukulele, drank out of flasks and yelled "Sis-boom-bah!".

Side note: I worked at the media center/tv studio in college. Dr. Fu, a brilliant Genetic Scientist would come in for camera equipment. Every time he came in, was the same routine:  He'd  look me dead in the eye like a cop and say  "You have equipment for me!?",  then break into a slow grin, " For Dr. Fu,.. F. U. !  
It continued for 4 years. Bless you, mad old scientist. 

Film Crew Slang

"Lock It Up"-  The process by which an area is secured for sound and picture is" locking it up". The 1st Assistant Director will usually call it out. It could be on the sound stage, at a door or on location...anywhere.Your battle station, especially as a Production Assistant (P.A.) may be to "lock it up."

"Bogie"- a person not affiliated with the production who enters the shooting area. A Production Assistant on lock up may call on the radio"We have a bogie coming around the corner of Smith St." in order to warn the shooting crew.

 "Lookie-Loo"- a gawking bogie who may potentially ruin a shot. Although sometimes they are handy if you need crowd reactions.

Choo Choo

"Trainspotting" (1996) is on BBC America today. This film is famous for 2 things, the creepiest baby ever and the "dirtiest toilet in Scotland". My skin crawls just thinking about it. Ewan Mac Gregor's star began to rise due to his portrayal of Renton, a drug addict in Edinburgh trying/not trying/trying to get straight. His addict friends are all at once funny, disgusting and savage. Adapted from the novel by Irvine Welsh and directed by "Slum dog Millionaire"s Danny Boyle.
FYI--Welsh's prose is worth checking out. I never read "Trainspotting" but I did read his book "Filth" and well...you decide for yourself. Let's just say it involves English cops on vacation, Amsterdam and an insatiable, talking tapeworm. Go ahead...I dare you....

Famous Last Words

When asked if he thought dying was tough, actor Edmund Gwenn replied:
Yes, it's tough, but not as tough as doing comedy.
Most of us have heard about that before but the interesting part is that Gwenn was most famous for playing Kris Kringle in Miracle on 34th Street (1947). Thus is the wisdom of Santa.

Film Crew Slang

"10-100" (Ten-one-hundred):  This is a walkie-talkie radio code for a visit to the restroom.
 **Alternative Hand signal-Put both balled fists together in front of you. Twist each fist, one towards your body, one away. The signal means "wringing it out, like a towel. There are several version of these codes.

More Dialogue Greatness

For the more sophisticated of you all....

"Let us drink, gentlemen. Let us drink, till we roll under the table in vomit and oblivion!"
Peter O'Toole as King Henry II in "Becket" (1964)
Big props to Marcus Asparagus Screwdriver III for sending in this quote.

"Beckett" also stars a sodden Richard Burton and the impeccable Sir John Geilgud.
Burton and O'Toole (what's in a name?) party like medieval rock stars until a rift in loyalties and duty set them apart. Some of their shenanigans could be right out of the celebrity pages of London's swingin' 60's, much like Burton & O'Toole themselves.

Pick of the Week

"Twisted Brain" otherwise titled as "Horror High"  (1974)
A Jeckle & Hyde story predating "Halloween" by a few years. Nerdy High school kid wreaks revenge on those who tortured him. No one is safe. Not even his pet Guinea Pig. Poor production value, acting and wardrobe design. A must see! Pure 70's schlock. I first saw this late night a few years after it came out.

Best Scene: Nerd does very bad things to his cruel Gym teacher while wearing metal cleats.

"Thank You Mask Man"

I discovered this animated film years ago in college. It was in the extras on a video (that's right, vhs tape) of the Lenny Bruce biopic "Lenny" starring Dustin Hoffman. Extra material wasn't common in the late 80's like it is today, so this gem is special. Thank You Mask Man was actually created after Lenny Bruce died. John Magnuson and Jeff Hale utilized recorded audio from"Dirty Lenny's" stand-up act. It explores prejudice/bigotry, hero worship, religion, sex & society. All of the things Lenny was famous for discussing when no one else would. Check it out. It's a great 7 minute ride.
***Slight use of adult language

Thank You Maskman - Lenny Bruce

Dialogue Greatness...

“So you’re gonna tell me that you don’t have no black cats, no roman candles or screamin’ mimis? Oh, come on man, you don’t got no lady fingers, buzz buddies, sneaker bombs, church burners, finger blasters, gut busters, zippity doo das or crap flappers? You’re gonna stand there owning a fireworks stand, and tell me you don’t have no whistling bungholes, no spleen splitters, whisker bisquits, honkey lighters, hoosker dos, hoosker don’ts, cherry bombs, nipsy daisers, with or without the scooter stick or one single whistling kitty chaser?”---------------David Spade in Joe Dirt (2001)

 

Film Crew Slang

“Picture’s Up”- Commonly used phrase that the First Assistant Director (1st AD) calls out on the set just prior to filming, which indicates rehearsal is over and the next shot will be committed to film. The long version is “This is for Picture”. 

The Original Bad Azzzz

Jack Webb was the producer and star of the radio & then television cop show "Dragnet".  As police detective Sgt. Joe Friday, his dead pan delivery of lines was so square it was hip. Here are some of my favorites:

Friday: Next time you want to make the news, step in front of a bus.

------------------------------

Witness (refusing to testify because he doesn't want to get involved): "Mr. Friday, if you were me, would you want to get involved?

Friday: Can I wait a while?

Witness; "Huh?"

Friday: Before I'm you.
---------------------------

Police Captain: Shotgun, extreme close range, double-O. Starkey was hit four times, first two cut him in half.

Friday: The second two turned him into a crowd. 

 

The original television show aired from 1951 to 1959. Webb then brought it back in a new form 1967-1970. These "new" episodes are the shows that I remember from childhood. In it, all hippies said "groovy" and "far out" & were so blasted out of their minds that they committed heinous crimes! The moderately funny 1987 film "Dragnet" starring Dan Akroyd and Tom Hanks pays homage to it.
Still, nothing beats Jack Webb's campy, self-righteous, truly weird dialogue.

Pick of the week

Thunder Road (1958)- Soldier turned bad boy moonshiner Robert Mitchum battles gangsters and the police.
Best scene:  Some thug tries to run Mitchum off the road. Ol' Bob casually flicks his cigarette out the window where it lands in the other driver's lap. The car flies off the embankment while the driver screams like a little girl.

Film Crew Slang

Apple Box: A  plywood box that is a standard piece of gear on a film set. They are used as platforms to raise or lower furniture, equipment or even actors. Lights and other gear can be mounted on them or dolly track leveled.There are literally hundreds of uses for this item. They also come in different sizes....full apple (8"×20"×12"), 1/2 apple (4" x 20" x12"), 1/4 apple (2"×20"×12") and an 1/8 apple also known as a pancake (1"×20"×12")

Extra: Grip to Ground Adapter: An apple box being used as a seat by one of the grips.

One for the Kids....

In "Toy Story, the carpet pattern in  Sid's hallway is the same as the carpet pattern in Kubrick's ultimate creep-you-out film "The Shining".   It's just a different color. Heeeeere's Woody!

Turner Classic Movies has Orson Wells on Monday 8/8

MONDAY, AUGUST 8 ---ORSON WELLES
  6:00 AM The Tartars (’61)
  7:30 AM Tomorrow is Forever (’46)
  9:30 AM Moby Dick (’56)
11:30 AM The V.I.P.s (’63)
  1:30 PM The Stranger (’46)
  3:15 PM Journey Into Fear (’42)
  4:30 PM Trent’s last Case (’53)
  6:15 PM Mr. Arkadin (’62)
  8:00 PM The Third Man (’49)
10:00 PM Citizen Kane (’41)
12:15 AM Touch of Evil (’58)
  2:15 AM The lady from Shanghai (’48)
  4:15 AM Immortal Story (’68)

Extra: Don't miss Touch of Evil!!

Film Crew Slang

Additional Pages: Last minute script changes/rewrites handed out to the various departments on set. They are printed on colored paper to track the changes. The pages are usually numbered in order to be traceable so as to dissuade anyone from giving away the plot to their blogger friends or paparazzi.

Pick of the week

Thunder Road (1958)- Soldier turned bad boy moonshiner Robert Mitchum battles gangsters and the police.
Best scene:  Some thug tries to run Mitchum off the road. Ol' Bob casually flicks his cigarette out the window where it lands in the other driver's lap. The car flies off the embankment while the driver screams like a little girl.

Lets start off with the Silents....

Silent Movie (1976), Directed by Mel Brooks
A modern day silent film about the making of a modern day silent film. Say that again, please?
Film Director Mel Funn (Mel Brooks) convinces his producer (Sid Caesar) to make a modern day silent film in order to save the studio from a hostile takeover.  Extra Butter- The only person in the film to actually have a spoken line is Marcel Marceu, the famous mime. He says "Non!" when asked to be in their film.

Extra Extra- Look for the scene where they set up a cardboard cutout of starlet Vilma Kaplan (Bernadette Peters) in the boardroom.